She scratched absently, stared out the window, and tried her best to not feel utterly miserable and alone.The curtains parted near the cockpit and Hol...y walked back slowly, sank down on her knees, put her hands on Gene's leg and Tamara's knee. Gene watched her a moment, his guilt and fears draining him of fight."Listen, Gene. Tamara. I'm sorry about this, I really am. I wish it wasn't this way, but there was no choice. You'd have both been dead by now, your kids, too, if we hadn't acted. I hope. So I took my leave from the inn and went south, notreally knowing what I had to expect, but at least I had a goal.After two weeks of wandering the roads of the country I finally reachedMidriver, the great city of the south, where the Academy was. Having lived formore than ten years on a farm I had been able to provide myself with enough foodto make it to the city, but when I finally stared at the gates in awe, Irealized that not everything might go as I wanted it to go. First, there wereway too. She took the groceries to the kitchen while I got out of my sweater and put my work materials away. Then I turned on the CD player and put it on ‘shuffle.’ Soon the room was filled with the soft strains of Enya. ‘Make yourself at home.’ I told her as I passed her on the way to the kitchen. She seemed very shy about following my instructions, though. I began putting the food away and getting out those things that I would need to make my special spaghetti and spicy meat sauce. As I worked on. Then I pulled back onto Route 9 and carefully drove home.I sat at my kitchen table and shook. I was feeling good about myself.Work was going well. I had beaten a good tennis player in straight sets.I was dressing more often and a bit more openly. Despite all of thiswithout a second thought I had almost walked into a bar for drinks.I felt the rungs of the ladder slipping through my fingers and paced theapartment repeating to myself "Deborah does not drink. You can beatthis." When I calmed down I.
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